When Do We Stop Letting Our Past Define Us?

We are all products of our past, what has happened to us up to this point has shaped who we are. But at what point do we stop talking about our history and simply be who we have become?

If you know I grew up poor with barely enough money for food, do you appreciate more the fact that I can pay my bills without worrying where the money is coming from?

If you know I was teased, called fat even though I wasn’t, do you better understand what an achievement it is for me to feel good about the way I look?

If you know my mother never played with us as kids, telling us she was never taught how to play, do you grasp the difference in my parenting style?

If you know my ex used my fear to keep me from leaving, do you have greater compassion for the strength it took to walk away?

Am I a better person because of what I’ve been through? I got divorced almost 7 years ago and still sometimes the thought passes through my mind….if they knew where I started then…

My goal in writing about my past is to let others know that real change is possible. Wherever you are starting, however bad it is if you choose to make a change, you can. It may be difficult in the beginning. It may seem impossible. You may need professional help, someone more qualified than me. But it is possible, if you take that first step.

And yet I also have this lingering feeling…that I somehow have to justify where I am by showing how far I’ve come. As if it means more that I can confidently walk into a Meetup with 50 strangers because speaking even to one person felt impossible once upon a time.



Today’s word of the day!

Word of the Day Challenge

The Word of the Day is Exemplary

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  1. 1.
    serving as a desirable model; very good.
    “exemplary behaviour”
    synonyms: perfectidealmodelfaultless, without fault, copybookflawlessimpeccableconsummateMore
  2. 2.
    (of a punishment) serving as a warning or deterrent.
    “exemplary sentencing may discourage the violent minority”
    synonyms: serving as a deterrent; More

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