I Do Not Blame You For the Assumptions I Have Made

I made an assumption. My mistake. It won’t happen again.

I assumed when you said you loved me, you knew what love was. Silly really.

I assumed when you said, “for better or for worse,” you wouldn’t be the cause of the “worse.” I was confused.

I assumed when you held your baby, you would cherish her as if she mattered. I was blind.

I assumed some day we would be enough for you, that you would be happy. Completely my fault.

I assumed when you fought for equal custody, it was because you wanted to be with your children. Laughable now that I think about it.

I assumed you would be happier with your new girlfriend, your new wife. Ridiculous of me.

I assumed when you had a new baby, you might feel complete. I overestimated your ability to change.

I assumed when you told your children you would take them one last time to see the home where they grew up, that you would follow through. Preposterous of me.

Why do I continue to assume that you will ever be anything except what you are? Why do I believe some day you will stop disappointing your children? Why do I ever give you the benefit of the doubt or think you will follow through?

You are who you are. You continue to blame everyone and everything except yourself; and so you will never change. Your life will never get better. If I continue to hold faith that you will be anything except who you are, that is my mistake. I will probably make the same one again, but I do not blame you for my poor judgement.

This post is in response to the daily writing prompt Assumption

Pin this to save it for later!

23 thoughts on “I Do Not Blame You For the Assumptions I Have Made”

  1. I felt all of this very clearly… Although I did not have children, my recent separation also brought up many similar realizations… They can be so painful, but, from my perspective at least, much less so once they have been named and removed from the shadows. I hope that writing this was a healing activity for you, Dee.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. It is so courageous of you to express how you feel.. You are filled with energy, love, hope and sparkle.. Shine always and spread light like you do…

    Very poignant poetry! You have made ne speechless..

    Much Love and Best Wishes
    Amrita

    Liked by 1 person

    1. 😊 thank you! I needed a constructive way to express how angry I was. It was cathartic and although I didn’t forgive him immediately this helped get me there!

      Like

      1. So glad to hear that Dee.. Yes, writing has it’s own magic.. You just need to keep faith in this like you have! And soon all your hard times would be converted into wonderful time with people who love you immensely.

        And I want to say this Bravo my dear for surviving all the pain!

        XX

        Liked by 1 person

      2. ❤️ thank you. Sometimes it is hard to keep the faith, to write when I’m not sure why I’m writing. But I am determined to persist. I write every day so that it doesn’t fade into the background as it has in the past. I appreciate your support on this journey! 😁😊

        Like

Join the Conversation

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s